The foundation of systemic phenomenological work


26 October 2020| Personal

Survive and Live

I am seeing more and more aggression and polarization in the world. Apparently, all the measures taken to combat the pandemic are causing many different emotions at the same time; aggression is often the first outlet for unmanageable emotions.

Living in uncertainty about how you are going to make it economically and at the same time measures that are imposed from above are a breeding ground for thinking in terms of guilt.

Thinking about who is to blame is a way of staying innocent yourself.

And it is a form of dissociation.

And dissociation is an effect of trauma.

And when we are traumatized, we are in survival mode.

And in survival mode, it is difficult to really live your life fully.

The annoying thing about an uncertain situation is that it also triggers reactions from previous trauma, even from traumas of our ancestors, or even the traumas of an entire country or people. Then we are guided by the survival instinct that requires very quick decisions: you either choose this ór that. Survival patterns think in “either-or” and “us versus them”. An effective instinct for animals that have little choice but to flee or fight, but unfortunately we humans have created a much more complex world with countless options. We humans need exchange in order to learn, to develop further. And exchange means that you can let the reality of the other enter ínto yours and that relationships can develop.

But then you must first become aware of the survival patterns that govern you. As soon as you are aware of them, you can make more conscious choices. Your perspective becomes wider than thinking in us versus them, in either-or.

In this awareness, you can smile at your survival patterns when they want to take back the wheel. You can step out of survival mode and start living your life. You can contribute to life, even when the circumstances are uncertain.

In the workshop SURVIVE AND LIVE you learn to recognize your own survival patterns and you can practice finding your place in Life, in addition to the surviving mode.

See you on Zoom, October 31, 2.30 – 6.30 PM CET!

Please click on this link for more information and to subscribe:


Bibi Schreuder

Dutch Bert Hellinger Institute

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About the Bert Hellinger Institute

People are constantly evolving. With each other, without each other. In families, in teams, in organizations. Systemic thinking makes us aware of the “why” of our being and doing. Organizational and family constellations create room for movement. The BHI provides courses, workshops and training programs in the field of systemic work, constellations, leadership and coaching. This is how we contribute to the development of people, organizations and society.

For up-and-coming and established leaders. An initiative of the Bert Hellinger Institute.