The foundation of systemic phenomenological work


8 October 2020| Crisis, Transformation, Societal, Other

To live or to survive in times of uncertainty?

The moment I write this question down, tears come to my eyes.  Are these tears of sorrow, or…?

I notice that in these times of uncertainty tears are always lurking, not only with me, I also notice it with the people around me. When somebody mentions the possibility of a new lockdown the tears find their way out. I actually have no idea what emotion those tears represent.  I also have no idea on behalf of whom I might be crying those tears for… or is this my own response to uncertainty?  And is it really my response?  Or is it an inherited way of survival from my ancestors? And does that mean that I am now surviving, while I can also enjoy life so much when I feel the sunshine on my back and see the last flowers of summer still blossoming through.

I’m not even sure if I can feel if I am living or surviving.

And is facilitating an online workshop coming from a state of survival, or from a state of living?

I love working with groups so much that something in me is very much against working online.

But I also love to learn so much, that something really comes to life in me to find out what I can do with online systemic work. And now that I write that down, I also feel the stubbornness (old pattern!) taking the floor: I have been doing that online work for so long, with telephone coaching, that is nothing new! In short, all kinds of voices are screaming inside me.

If I look at that systemically, I can recognize that all those voices are connected to the different “consciences” that run systems and me.

“I don’t want anything to change, I want the world to stay as it is”. Ah, in that I recognize the personal conscience, the domain of the will: that, what I want from life.

And the stubborn “I’ve been doing that for a long time, that’s nothing new!” (with the stubborn tone of: you don’t have to teach me anything anymore) is such a typical Schreuder’s pattern (my family of origin). Those patterns that are connected to how it was, how people survived thén. Oh gosh, are those patterns of the system conscience coming after me again?

And that voice that says, “I really want to find out how it works and whether it will be something for me.” I feel the energy of evolutionary conscience flowing through me. Then I feel life, but it almost seems as if I have to answer to the voices from those other consciences…

Just writing this down brings peace to my stomach.

In the workshop on October 31 I will guide you through these consciences to explore your own states of survival and state living. An online workshop, anyone all over the world can participate. When I connect with all those people, I feel the life in me. Exploring survival brings me to life!

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